How bad is 2019? They want to revisit one of the biggest disasters of the 1980s and bring back New Coke

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Everyone looks back at the 1980s through the wistful prism of nostalgia. Every generation does this — if you were reared in the era you tend to only recall the good things, and want to go back “to when it was better!”

There is a psychological phenomenon when you tend to blot out the negative aspects; He-Man cartoons, Jefferson Starship, “Matt Houston”, the Pontiac Fiero…YUPPIES!

And we are about to be re-immersed in that decade with one of the biggest commercial calamities of that era coming back to stores soon. Sure, it nearly destroyed a cultural icon and a product that has been a symbol of America for over a century, so why not try it out for a second go-round?!

Everyone: I don’t think Stranger Things can get any more 80’s. Stranger Things: Hold my New Coke… #StrangerThings3 #Enjoy pic.twitter.com/xnCGY1dkrQ

— Coca-Cola (@CocaCola) May 21, 2019

Yes, the show nostalgia-steeped program is returning on July 4, and scenes will be featuring that most famous of corporate disasters in its storyline. And the Coca Cola company is looking to reinvigorate its bottom line, hoping Gen-Xers will throw back a few cans of some throwback soda.

Hey, cut them some slack, maybe this cola is just like socialism — it simply has not been tried correctly yet! At least the fans are feeling it.

WHAT WHAT WHATTTTTT OMG

— Farah Nabilah Al ✨ (@farpsh) May 21, 2019

Okay I’ve seen this particular coke in every classic hit 🎥 you gotta bring this back. But it has to be for good cause the logo is so 80s it’s 😎

— Kenneth Brown (@Xtrafied) May 21, 2019

That's… kinda neat!

…also sneaking it in as an option in those freestyle machines would be cool. Along with Surge.

— Rudolf (@RudolfWolph) May 21, 2019

One can only hope that this carbonated revival will mean the return of that deeply ’80s spokesperson — Max Headroom!

In all fairness, this cannot be a bad gambit. While initially the change in the recipe was a public relations disaster for the brand, once they brought back “Classic Coke” the outraged fans not only cooled their jets but sales for the soda soared past their sales figures from before the change.

New Coke had a simple genesis; the 99-year copyright on Coke was running out and they were going to have to reveal the formula. When asked, the CEO said they'd take it off the market first–which is what they did, and then re-copyrighted it as Coke Classic for 99 more years.

— Carl W. Brown, Jr. (@carlwbrownjr) May 21, 2019

Why, this is almost as nefarious as when the International House of Pancakes “changed” its name to IHOB!!!

Doing a limited edition revival of New Coke as a ST3 promo is brilliant. (I hope they dust off the old can design, tho — that was the best part!) https://t.co/FbtimmoUuY

— Dinosaur Dracula (@DinosaurDracula) May 21, 2019

That would be a dose of cool nostalgia, but there are other plans afoot.

Can we get @Stranger_Things limited edition coke cans please

— Ash James (@Frozendeath5467) May 21, 2019

This is, in fact, going to happen.

I need the @Stranger_Things @CocaCola bottle pic.twitter.com/ImWFR9Gw1A

— concerts are life🌐💎 (@Starmusic101) May 21, 2019

And let it be known, for those select individuals who have a twisted affection for the screwed up aspects of our culture and crack up at twisted marketing and branded tie-in products, these bottles and cans are going to be must-have items this summer! (Not…that anyone specific is being mentioned, just that there is a likelihood of these being purchased and placed on the shelf in their personal office…you know, by those kinds of people who like bad movies and odd promotional partnerships.)

Huh. I assumed they burned the recipe and launched its ashes into space.

— Woo hoo Sox (@thatluckyolsun) May 21, 2019

Likewise.

WHY would they want to 'bring back' a total and complete failure just to gain sales?? sorry that doesn't make any bit of sense to me

— Jeanne Bianco (@JeanneB1962) May 21, 2019

I guess the phrase “to gain sales” was elusive???

Simply put, this can only lead to the next brilliant batch of soda nostalgia to hit the store shelves: Prepare yourselves for the re-arrival of Clear Pepsi, any day now!!!

 

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